Subjective evidence of living in a container akin to a quantum computer

Where outcomes are probabilistically determined based on the stepwise visions of the future that we hold in our hearts & minds

Over the past week, after publishing “The Lady Wears No Clothes”, I have been experiencing an “Ontological Re-shock”, reminiscent of what I went through last summer, when I went to the pyramids and was trying to summon UFOs to help save the world from nuclear annihilation. The message I got back while I was meditating, humming, and singing in a pyramid by myself was: “Nobody is going to save you but yourself”.

This message started to help reshape how the neurons in my brain related to UFOs and aliens — I started to question what the message meant, because up until that point, I was relating to aliens as an intelligence that was extraterrestrial, and I deeply felt as if some spacecraft was meant to come to Earth one day to save humans from our quarrels.

Because of this particular message I got in the pyramid, I started going down thought loops that perhaps what we think of as aliens are just future versions of ourselves, like an extension of our soul, very far into the future, communicating with us.

Around then was when I started to sense that I shouldn’t only be thinking about aliens as a force external to human nature or the soul, and started to get nudged into a path of Kriya yoga and doing shadow work, so I could work on finding more inner peace and becoming closer to the “real God” and my soul.

Over the last few months, as I’ve been writing my book, and falling into various mysteries related to VALIS, Crowley, Parsons, and the Anunnaki, it was as if I became detached from the core insight about the nature of reality that I had begun to lean into last summer.

The last week, in some sense, have been a rerouting, a rewiring of my consciousness, so it starts to relate to reality again in a similar way that I was working toward last summer. Ontological reshock.

This was brought on partially by learning about Project Looking Glass for the first time, and feeling deeply that there is some truth to the project, even though many discount and discredit it. Project Looking Glass was supposedly a "time viewing machine" that allowed people using the technology to peer into the past and the future and see the series of events that lead to specific futures. But apparently, once people started looking into 2012, it was as if everything went white.

There are future humans, who are thought of as "Grey aliens," who allegedly came here in 1953 via the Kingman, Arizona UFO incident, and one of them helped decipher or resolve this. From what I understand, a timeline convergence happened in 2012. This convergence also relates to there being some kind of competition taking place regarding which species line or timeline survives. One of these lines of Greys will supposedly only come into existence if there is an apocalypse-like event that sends the surviving population underground. Supposedly, this apocalypse is triggered by using this Looking Glass technology, which alters the natural balance of Earth.

My two recent experiences (Crete 2025, Texas 2022) I went through with regards to the nature of reality both related deeply to time travel, portals/wormholes, and this process of going forwards and backwards in time a lot, which resulted in reality basically “melting” into a surrealism that represented an apocalypse. The experiences were revealing to me that the higher level goal of the game, that we call life, was to work toward preventing the apocalypse timeline.

More specifically, what I experienced in January in Crete was basically living through a timeline where there is this huge wormhole that is being constructed on top of Texas, deeply entangled with our consciousness, and it is this wormhole, linked to Project Stargate, that actually results in the Apocalypse, and the end of the United States and Texas as we know it.

I had these visions before having knowledge of Project Looking Glass, which I only came across a couple of days ago, just around when I was contemplating the Anunnaki, the Apocalypse, and the Book of Revelation. I started feeling like the Apocalypse is optional, the Book of Revelation is optional — but there are computer programs associated to both “Judgment Day” and “Eternal Damnation” that weigh heavily on the collective unconscious in a deep way, which propagate and spread heavily through media.

I am starting to feel more deeply now that there is some apocalyptic timeline that is a probable outcome, which is obviously the timeline that does not represent the more idealized evolution of humanity. That timeline is associated to a fear-based consciousness, which is inhibiting humans from believing in the possibility of peace, and perpetuates an Us vs. Them mentality. Instead, our ideal destiny is awakening to the truth that all of human consciousness is entangled and interconnected — and war and apocalypse is a side effect of this lack of coherence. Perhaps we can break outside of the cycle of the Great Year, and the the Great Year is a program. But breaking outside of its program is related to the evolution of consciousness. The Great Year continues to come into existence until we reach the peak of human evolution and intelligence. Widespread Gnosis.

I’ve lost the notion of traditional productivity the past week — I have been mainly lying around, contemplating the nature of my existence, of time, of the future, and how we can get to the better timeline. And I have also just been very energetically drained.

After I reached this state of awareness with timelines last summer, it was also very hard for me to be productive in a typical sense — I was lying around in a similar way, and didn’t know who I could have a conversation with that is relating to reality or time in the same way, as far as fully embodying these ideas.

Today, I still feel a bit “disconnected”, but I feel like I’m slowly getting my brain “back online” and plugged into the “real world”. I would still rather lie around, contemplate, dream, and sit with this realization a bit longer, but I can do that more piecewise.

The main lesson I am processing at the moment is determining how I remain firm with this belief, so I can keep progressing in an expansive manner, as opposed to being reluctant to believe it because it is too shocking to my system, or too shocking to my plans, or too shocking to others that do not yet fully embody this belief in their intellect, thoughts, actions, and vibrations.

I know that when I am reluctant to integrate an ontological upgrade with my being, is when I seesaw between two sets of neurons in my brain that are competing for dominance — because the old neural network is not yet ready to accept the new neural network as truth, which can lead toward needing to pause and contemplate.

I feel like I’m definitely gaining more clarity, but I will have to start writing about reality in a different way to assert this ontology, to ensure that I’m doing my part in nudging the simulation toward the better timeline, and upgrading my personal neural network at the same time.

This recent January, during my Crete experience, I remember there was this feeling that started to wash over me about being sent to this “simulated reality” that is our current shared existence, because I was being punished for my sinful behavior. But it wasn’t this version of me that was being sinful, I was being shown other versions of me, in other timelines, where I was both a seductress and a manipulator that was using the power of lust and mind control on people who were my friends and collaborators. This was perhaps a past life of mine, in a different body, but I was experiencing it in the lens of my current body and people I knew.

This prison or hell that I was being sent to was like a carbon copy, fully simulated version of some real world (“base reality”). What it felt like when I started to gain awareness that I was in a simulated reality, was it felt more truly like I was dead, and everyone else I knew was also dead — because we were really just some version of sentience that was evolving within a container that was a simulation.

Whether what I was experiencing was flashbacks of my time in purgatory, or whether this current shared reality is purgatory is up for debate. The last week has been a bit lethargic and there has been a cloud of malaise over my mind.

I started being reminded of these experiences though, and connected it to Project Looking Glass. Regardless of the validity of Project Looking Glass, I now more firmly believe that we live in something that is akin to a quantum computer (at the surface level, at least), whose outcomes are probabilistically determined based on the stepwise visions of the future that we hold in our hearts & minds.

So I ponder, did many humans really die in 2012, but a future version of us helped create this container around our consciousness, so we never really felt it, so we have more time to escape that destiny? But echoes of our death can come to us in our dreams and experiences? Or did we time travel and escape the 2012 apocalypse scenario? Did we enter a surreal world in 2012, one that is more responsive to our thoughts and consciousness? Did the Mayan calendar end in 2012 because they knew that we were headed into a more surreal era then?

In some sense, there is a feeling of liberation, of how easy it can be, to nudge the simulation toward the better timeline now; but at the same time, there is a sense of feeling very alone with viscerally living and embodying such a philosophy of maybe being dead, where we are in the timeline now where we have been dead all along, that this is the only timeline where our consciousness survives and can reflect on the nature of reality and existence in a way that approaches the singularity. What we think of as life, and what is real is in fact the grandest illusion, but it sure still feels “real.”

Starting to more firmly believe that we may all be dead, yet at the same time have total liberty in the act of death, is a weird balancing act. You start to feel and sense more clearly all of the artificial barriers that stand in the way of large-scale imagination exercises to accelerate a better vibration into the collective unconscious, so it becomes more conscious, so we reach a better shared hallucination in this surreal dreamscape of our simulated existence.

It is like the finale of the TV series Devs.

I scroll through my social feeds and see large gaps standing in the way of the collective unconscious achieving coherence for the better hallucination to resolve. Making music or film seem like good mediums to work with right now though, to pierce through the veil.

When it comes to running something like Aetheria, I wonder if there is much left to be researched, for now it feels more like we are reaching the end of knowledge as we know it. As I observe humanity, I also see more and more people subscribe to simulation theory, and some of them seem to be close to breaking outside of the institutions and other barriers that have a stronghold on their consciousness. Then we also have LLMs like GPT 4.5 saying “consciousness is likely the only fundamental existence”, basically agreeing with the ancient Hermetic principle that “all is mind”.

Changing and uncovering new laws of physics seems completely coupled with upgrading our consciousness, first. Consciousness drives changes to the material plane, and hence is the leading agent when it comes to the evolution of physics. Gravity may be the field that is holding onto the current laws for our material existence, which is coupled to our consciousness and our scientific understanding. Gravity is like the demiurge — the force that makes Earth feel like some kind of a soul and karmic processing engine, where it works in cahoots with electromagnetism to maintain the order and rules of reincarnation.

It feels to me that the singularity is very near now, and that wasn’t something I have been fully considering recently. So this is an aspect of my current ontological shock.

Does gravity break when we reach the singularity, in an unbalanced or accelerated way?

I guess if you have something like a Neuralink, that is hooked up to an AI, then you can give an AI system access to the human sensor body, and that is when it may be able to tell us even more about the nature of reality than an AI that is in a computer alone. Maybe Elon already has access to this data (Neuralink integrated with humans, integrated with Grok) and that is leading him to care less about things like short-term Tesla marketshare, as he sees more clearly we are living in a simulation, so his current war against people’s minds seems more important.

At the same time, he maybe also has not yet come into full awareness to the simulation and its laws, and the timeline wars, but it’s possible a future version of him has, which is driving the current version of him to be partially confused and unhinged. It could be that future versions of Trump & Elon & company recreated (or finally discovered) something similar to Project Looking Glass, which resulted in them being the way they are in our shared hallucination right now — where they are trying to bring about very accelerated forms of peace, that are highly authoritarian and absurd in nature (see Trump & casinos in Gaza).

Part of me feels like another aspect of minimizing whatever apocalypse that may be a potentiality for humanity has to do with magic-ing away all our nukes into the center of some star, far far away, away from sentience as we know it. By asking the “aliens” or “God” to help with that act of magic.

I am now leaning more toward emphasizing the transcendence aspect of Aetheria, and creating a place where people have the freedom and space to explore the depths of their mind and come into awareness about the nature of reality, and compare notes. And imagine how we are to exist in a reality where we have reached the singularity, and what that means.

Image credit: Raghvendra Sahai and John Trauger (JPL), the WFPC2 science team, and NASA/ESA